hosa conference day 1

hmm so today was the first day of hosa conference, so far its just like the good old times. the suckiest part was...waking up so early! dude! seriously i need my sleep D= but yeah so my dad drove me there, but it was kinda akward...haha cause he told me to pray with him, so i did. it was nice...i guess? xD
So all of us got onto the bus and the bus ride there seemed shorter than last year, probably because we had so much stuff to catch up on each other. Yeah but i had to pee alot xD yeah so we got there and we didn't get our rooms yet but we went to christina's room and put our stuff there until we got our room. haha i feel kinda bad for them because they are sharing a room with a stranger but i guess they can make friends xD
So today i was extremely tired and hyper! haha but then after the test session EVERYONE was extermly tired! we were all braindead, it was like 3 hours of straight testing. yeah then we went to see the campus of oregon state universitiy but the tour guides went off so we speant forever to get there for nothing. We came back and the teachers got us pizza. Ms.lloyd is such a sweetie!!! she bought us so much food! fruits, bagels, muffins, and snacks! she is so nice!
Yeah then we had hosa bowl....ohhhh myyyy. we were thrid seating for some effing reason and we had to wait like 2 hours just to go in and look stupid =_= gahhhh oh well memories memories xD
then afterwards we went to the hottub. oh my it was sooo relaxing! it felt so nice. We (baongoc, jennifer, alysha, victor, and I) were alll sitting there just talking and stuff. haha yeap now im just exhuasted.

sighhh....just sighhhh i dont know how i feel now. i dont know why i feel like this....who knows....sigh...i really dont know....my heart just keeps aching...but i dont know why. oh god help me. I dont even know what i want anymore, why am i here? why am i so insecure....i hate myself so much sometimes. i dont want to loose a good thing, maybe that's why i am so insecure....i need to become more open and not so protective....sigh.....